Newborn + 12 (14) Hour Drive = Recipe for Disaster?

Not hardly. I was so stressed about traveling with Sadie Marie yesterday I could barely sleep on Friday night. Well it was partially stress, but mostly I felt like a kid at Christmas. Getting to spend two weeks with my mom and dady is like opening my new nintendo in 1985. Yep, I just went 1985 on y'alls asses and it's not because I love them SO much as I love their help with the baby SO much! :) I seriously felt like that yesterday when we arrived, but first let me tell y'all about the trip.

It was not as bad as the look the doctor gave me on Friday when I told her I was planning to travel 12+ hours with Sadie Marie the next day. She looked at me like I was a fidiot and said, she can travel just don't take her in big crowds, don't let anyone kiss her on the face, and have folks wash their hands before they hold her. Got it. Treat everyone like they have anthrax poisioning and don't let anyone touch the baby. Get real lady. I'm from Alabama, I'll be lucky if she gets back without being licked from head to toe by the dogs much less held by anyone. I came here to show her off not hide her from the world like she's a Jew in 1942 Nazi Germany.

On to the trip. It was pleasant, we had a few moments. For example, we pulled over at a reststop at 7 AM, we had been on the road for two hours but it had been three since Sadie Marie ate so it was time, but a reststop, come on, can I get a gas station. Annoyed with the driver is a pleasant way to put my mood. I was reading, enjoying the ride and the next thing I know we are in BFE Virginia at a reststop that didn't even have vending machines. This is a road trip......please take note we stop at gas stations and get food when we stop. Haven't you ever traveled with a Morton before? Geez. On to lunch. We stop in Gastonia, NC. Rather than help me with the baby, he's starving and wants to know what I want to eat? I don't know asshole, the baby is screaming, I'm more concerned with her lunch than mine right now but thanks for the support. I'll change her diaper too, go get your freaking food. Fast forward to 5:45 PM, we are in Lowndes County about 30 minutes from the promise land and I thought it was going to fall apart for real. Sadie Marie is clearly becoming annoyed with being in her car seat for 14 hours but she's still sleeping for the most part, but then it happened all at once. I guess Cash had had enough of the baby, he rolled her window down like he had been plotting to chunk her out it all day and the sun shade came crashing down, Bailey started barking at the child molester driving the 18 wheeler beside us, Cash joins Bailey in barking, I'm hollering at the driver to go around, he's hollering back he can't there's a fidiot in front of him blocking the road, Sadie Marie starts screaming.......Thirty minutes from home and it's going to the shitter. Well, not on my watch. I fixed the sun shade, instructed the driver to ride the ass of the guy in front of him and cut off the 18 wheeler, which resolves the barking issues of both dogs and told EVERYONE in the car to lock it up. Mom's everywhere would have been proud.

Thirty minutes later we turned into 818 Old Marion Junction Road and I don't think I had every been happier. It's hard to watch your 4 week old daughter sit in a car seat and wiggle all day because she wants to stretch. We perservered and now we are in Selma for two whole weeks.

If this place had more to offer we would move back in a heartbeat. The past few weeks have been exhausting all alone in VA. It's a challenge to do just about anything when I'm home alone and even when the Baby Daddy is there, there's only two of us. I need a nanny or maybe a second set of arms. There is something to be said about raising your kids 12 hours from your family. Everyone keeps telling me they don't know how I do it, but the good news is it's been 4 weeks and we have decided to keep Sadie Marie so I guess we will just keep on keepin' on. I saw her first smile yesterday so I guess she's decided to keep us too.

We've been here almost 24 hours and I think my family is getting used to the idea of me being a mom. Today my grandmother told me she never thought I would have something so precious. Thanks. I get it, I used to be a douche but I have a Master's degree, I've been married for 8 years, and just had a baby........I guess I turned out OK. All I know is the baby is still alive and she survived the trip. We got this parent thing covered so far anyway. Talk to me in 13-16 years and see where we are.

Cunnie and Peggy were all over it this morning while I took the husband to the airport, but when I got back Sadie Marie was making them earn their keep. She cries in the morning and sleeps in the afternoon and at night. It's just who she is, she fights me when I try to burp her and she does not love to burp. I called it. I told them she would settle down around 1 and sleep all afternoon. You can see as I'm writing this blog she is clearly asleep and when I say asleep I mean borderline comatose. It's stressful for a Grammy and a CiCi to not be able to calm her down, I get it. It's funny though, both of them raised four pretty awesome kids and while it's been 30 or so years they are still moms who get stressed when the baby won't stop crying. I love those ladies like no other for walking, burping, changing, feeding, and cleaning up spit up all day today while I got a break! SO......Aunt Peggy and CiCi Love you!!

Ok, it's hitting on 5:11 pm and I can almost guarantee she will be up by 6 PM to eat. It's hotter than hell down here and I am sweating just sitting here typing. I wish there was a pool or at the very least a slip in slide in the yard I could cool off in. I wonder if I can mark blog writing as my workout for the day?

Y'all be good,

Love y'all

April

Midday TV sucks, I Need a Hobby

So while I don't get a whole lot of down time these days, the down time I do have is filled with shows like "How It's Made", "Yes Dear", and "The Fresh Prince of Bel Air". I'm not complaining about watching these shows, I love some FPOBA, but I have now see every episode of ALL of these shows more than once and don't even get me started on "Law and Order" I can tell you who done it before the crime has even been committed, for every "Law and Order" on the air, not just the original. I mean really, you can only learn how light bulbs are made once.....and I KNOW I would rather have someone shove a nail up my nose than be a wig maker. The good news is if the Apocalypse ever does occur I'm all set. Between the Baby Daddy and I we can survive. He can keep us fed and navigate and I can make our own light bulbs, candles, and worcestershire sauce....no reason to sacrifice flavor just because the world has ended. I can also make ketchup.....for those of you who know my family trust me when I say, crisis averted.

I've started branching out on my midday TV........Gangland is a new venture. It's comical to say the least. Gang members have names like "Loco" and "Shank", if I ever join a gang I want my gang name is "Skid Mark". I will say I am learning a lot about the area I live in. Apparently the MS-13 has a big presence in Manassas, VA.......I work in Manassas. Awesome. I am also learning about the Bloods and Crips. Bloods wear red and Crips wear blue, they have "turfs" and sometimes go "trolling" on rival gang turfs looking for trouble like it's their job. Oh wait, it is their job. I did see a dude walking down the street the other day with a blue bandanna hanging out of his back pocket. Awesome......the Crips are also alive and well in Manassas, I bet they are scared of the MS-13 though, them Latino gangs are crazy.

So back to a new hobby, it's really too bad I don't like to do anything, I could probably get shit done but rather than try something new and get bored I think I will just sleep. Aerial America is on and while I do enjoy the show, they are showing Vermont AGAIN. Plus, Sadie Marie is actually swinging in her swing right now and between the rain and soothing music I'm surprised I'm not asleep on the computer right now. If anyone needs to know how to make a pool table or rope let me know I will get you the notes from How It's Made from today.

Sadie Marie is clearly rethinking choosing us as parents. This was a photo from last night, she is clearly exhausted and having a Scarlet O'Hara woe is me moment.

Love y'all,

April

UGH, I'm exhausted!

She just looks so serious all the time! She also likes to crack one eye and see if anything is worth looking at before she actually wakes up. So Funny!!

High Heels Suck After Pregnancy

So ever since I had Sadie Marie my mailbox has been overflowing with formula and baby magazines. I'm not in need of the formula just yet, but I am reading the baby magazines. Playing with Your Baby, Baby Talk, Baby Shit You Must Have.......Ok I made the last one up, but that should be the name of it, it's a catalog of neat gadgets that look like they make life with baby easier, but you probably don't really need. I'm sure we will be ordering something very soon.

Anyway, I was reading Baby Talk and there was an entire article on traveling with your baby........Ummmm, thank you Baby Talk, just what I needed we are planning to leave for a 12 hour drive to Alabama next Saturday and I need to get prepared for this trip. I read the article and it says you should plan a staycation first. Staycation?? Really you want me to book a hotel room in the same town I live in? Playas be broke these days, get real Baby Talk! Luckily the APUS Class of 2011 Commencement Ceremony was this weekend, Cunnie and John were in town to help out so we actually had a free "staycation" in the National Harbor, Maryland. We survived but I'm exhausted and I don't know if it's from the stress of traveling in a car with a newborn OR from the ceremony itself. I was not "working" but it's my "baby" nonetheless so I was nervous, especially when a guy had what appeared to be a heart attack about 10 minutes before the ceremony got ready to start and the paramedics WALKED into the auditorium to assist. They guy was out cold on the floor, then vomiting......what part of a 911 call does not mean HURRY. Thank Prince George's County, I'm just glad it was not me in distress. I could have driven myself to the hospital before your crappy paramedics arrived.

Back to the staycation........Friday started out awesome and when I say awesome what I really mean is shitty. Traffic in this area consist mostly of douche bags and dumbasses who can't drive, which leads to road rage, and ultimately a mom of 3 shoots a lady who cut her off. Traffic is serious shit around here and this weekend was legend.....wait for it.....dary. Yesterday the 30 minute drive to DCA took an hour, so by the time we got there Sadie needed a diaper change and to be topped off. We got the diaper change in but what sucks is you can't take them out of the car seat while the car is moving so her supper had to wait. MISTAKE! Should have fed her and left the diaper dirty, she screamed all the way from DCA to the National Harbor. I thought Cunnie was going to have a breakdown. The six mile trip took 45 minutes........Then on Saturday, the day of the ceremony, there was a wreck on 66 AND 495 was down to one freaking lane. Fifty percent of my volunteers didn't make the ceremony, did I mention we had almost 700 graduates walking and close to 5000 guests? Thanks traffic gods, I heart you too.

Since we were short on volunteers I was helping out during the ceremony and running all over the Gaylord National Convention Center in my fabulous Paris Hilton high heels was hazardous to my health. I have two ginormous blisters on the back of my feet. I ended up in flip flops, so I guess I'm going to have to train my feet to love high heels again. Oh well, I'm committed to making my feet high heel friendly again. I LOVE them and I can take the pain. I just birthed a child I will take on my entire closet of high heels.

The "staycation" was a pretty good idea. I learned that even if the trip is going to take an hour, pack a bottle or two. Nothing is worse than a screaming baby you can't feed. Oh wait, I know what is worse, my mom leaning over me trying to get to said screaming baby. Love you mom! Also, stop leaving the Baby Daddy with milk to give the baby, he's not going to feed it to her unless maybe I'm out of the country. He's terrified she's going to have a gas outbreak and scream for three days like she did a week or two ago. It's still fresh in his mind and he is terrified of those blood curling screams! In his defense, I'm scared of them too. But her screaming because she is hungry is almost as bad so I fed her her first bottle yesterday and she was not too excited about it but once she realized milk was on the other side of that rubber she sucked that thing down like she was playing minute to win it.

Today is Father's Day and while I thought all day yesterday was Father's Day and gave my dad and Theron their cards, I want to give a shout out to all the dad's today. Y'all are awesome but not as awesome as Mom's so just because they gave you a day of your own don't get cocky. Last night we had this conversation:

Baby Daddy: "Ugh, Sadie Marie has April's personality"
Cunnie: "What do you mean? How do you know?"
Me: "She's ornery like me......"
Baby Daddy: "True, but I was just reading that their true personality develops by age seven.....I'm going to have to spend a lot of time with her until then."
Me: "Love you too honey"
Cunnie: "HAHAHAHA"

I heart my family, the totally love me. You notice my daddy was not in one this conversation. I have his personality and he knows it.

Ok, y'all have a great Father's Day!

Love y'all

Daddy's Hugs are the Best! I still agree :)

April

Child Rearing and Dog Training....Is there Really a Difference?

So the past couple of days have been eventful. I left Sadie Marie alone with the Baby Daddy for the first time and it not a disaster. I went to a baby shower on Saturday.....I was gone 1.5 hours and I was about 3 minutes from home when he called:

Him: "Where are you? How far away? She's screaming........"
Me: "I'm three minutes away"
Him: "Click"

He hung up on me! Thanks buddy, I'm almost home, no need for the hostility.....I left two pages of instructions and six oz of fresh breast milk.....all you had to do was follow the instructions.....I think we all knew that was wishful thinking on my part. In his defense when I got home the bottle was fixed and sitting on the coffee table. I told him the next step would have been to feed it to Sadie Marie.

So we survived Saturday and I ventured out again on Sunday to a baby shower and it was less stressful, Sadie Marie slept the entire time I was gone and I got back in plenty of time to feed her. I have another outing planned for this afternoon, I have not been to the grocery store since Cunnie left almost two weeks ago. We are getting close to having to wipe with leaves, so on Sunday I started planning my grocery trip. It's super double at the store so they double coupons up to $1.99 and I love super double! It's a longer grocery trip so......hopefully it will be better than the last one where we left Cunnie alone with Sadie Marie!

I talked to Auntie Rae Rae today and this is my bestie who has been my bestie for more than 15 years since we were just amateur trouble makers in high school. She's been with me for a while and I value her opinion, while she does not have any kids of her own just yet, she's a teacher and so I feel like she has some insight to the child psyche so we were chatting about my trip to Alabama at the end of the month and how it was slightly ambitious to travel with a newborn and two dogs. I thought is might take us just under a week to get to AL. After we stop every 2-3 hours to feed, in reality a 12 hour trip is probably going to take 15-16 hours depending on how the baby does. I'm willing to risk it though to get some where near my mother for two weeks!

I was telling Reagan about how Sadie Marie cries sometimes and how it can be frustrating and disheartening when you don't know what to do to make them feel better or in the very least to get her to stop crying and Reagan said: "We use a spray bottle on the dog when he's bad so maybe you should try that."

Roger that, I'm immediately going to buy a spray bottle to squirt my one month old daughter when she won't stop crying. Chinese water torture just took on a new meaning. Newborn water torture sounds kinda like child abuse so maybe I will table this advice until she's 5 or 6 years old and will understand why she's getting squirted. I don't doubt the success of the technique, I just think we might be jumping the gun on utilizing it successfully at this young age.

Now, Reagan was just kidding but if y'all know us, it was hilarious! I really do need some advice on traveling with a newborn and two dogs. I'm most worried about the logistics of it all, Bailey is getting shafted to the back of the car so where is all our stuff going to go? I'm thinking about a trailer hitch carrier and hope all our stuff fits on it so no luggage has to go in the car. Also, I have all this frozen breast milk I want to bring with me.....how do I get it all to AL?

OK gotta go the little chipmunk is beckoning!

Love Y'all!

April

They are the best sleeping buddies!

GEEZ, I'm a fidiot!

So I figured out what was making Miss Sadie Marie so angry with mommy.......I was force feeding the poor child and her tummy was very upset with me! At the hospital they told me to feed her up to 20 minutes on each side.....so if she ate that long I fed her that long. BIG Mistake....HUGE! I should have been doing about 10 minutes on each side. After some research yesterday I realized that I might be overfeeding and low and behold last night we got about 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep in two separate intervals! She's much happier now that I'm not forcing her ping pong size tummy to hold a tennis ball full of milk! I feel kinda like a fidiot (this stands for effing idiot for those who don't know the term), but I guess overfeeding is better than underfeeding and no wonder she already weighs 8 lbs, her mommy was fatting her up like a Thanksgiving Day turkey! So last night and this morning were much less stressful and thankgoodness, I'm not sure the Baby Daddy was ready for the 3 hour scream fests I have been experiencing!

Thanks to my simple revelation I got my first post baby work out in this morning as well! I'm not sure I would call it a workout, but a 30 minute walk with Cash around the neighborhood was exactly what I needed to get my day started on the right foot. I fed the little toot and handed her off to the husband who she proceeded to projectile shit on as soon as he changed her diaper! It was hilarous! I was getting ready for my walk and I heard the distress call.....Ugh, Houston I need some help in here! I get to the changing table and the baby is naked, there's a dirty diaper, poop is on the changing table pad, and then she proceeded to pee. Here's our conversation:

Me: "Why is she naked?"
Him: "She projectile pooped while I was changing and already dirty diaper." "Help"
Me: "Ok, let's first get the poop pile off the changing table, grab a new diaper."
Him: "Ok, shit now she's peeing"
Me: " HAHAHAHAHAHA"
Him to the Baby: "You just love to pee and poop on me don't you."
Sadie: Her look said: "Yep, and you love me anyway"
Him: "Geez, you are just like you mother." "I'm in trouble"
Me: "Wahahahahah" (very evil laugh!)

I enjoy these little moments where I get to have some fun at his expense. It's not very often I get to laugh at him, he's freaking good at everything so I'm really enjoying this!

Today is a big day! I'm leaving Sadie Marie alone with her Daddy for the first time. My mom didn't leave me alone with my Daddy until I was six weeks old but today I have a baby shower to go to and since I'm trying to not let the world touch all over her just yet, (I need her to stay healthy for our Alabama trip!) so she's staying home with Daddy. She's not quite three weeks old.............I can't wait to see how this goes. I have a two page list for him already made. One page is what to do if she cries and the second page is how to feed her if he needs to use the milk I pumped this morning. Now I have never used a bottle warmer and he does not even know bottle warmers exist. I read the instructions this morning and its not rocket science but I can see a very stressed Baby Daddy screwing it up in the heat of screaming fit from Sadie Marie. I plan to feed her right before I leave and hope she will be good for the 1.5-2 hours I am gone but Murphy's Law says if it can go wrong it will and y'all know me.......I have to be prepared for everything in order to function in society SO.......I have two bottles fixed, instructions on how to heat them, and how to feed her. Now all he has to do is follow the instructions........ ;)

I will keep ya'll posted on our first day alone with daddy. I can't wait to see what the house looks like when I get back. Granted it's not in great shape now, but he can leave a trial of disaster when he gets flustered and a baby along with two dogs might make the great FBI man lose his mind. I hope not, I have a baby shower to go to tomrrow too :)

Y'all be good,

April

Look at my fat cheeks, just call me butterball.

I uncovered her hands today CiCi! and we love our outfit!

Had to Break out the Big Girl Underoos Today!

So the past few days have been trying around here to say the least. Little Miss Priss Pot aka Sadie Marie has been showing her you know what! After her 9 am feeding she pitches a fit until about 1 or 2 pm with small sporadic bouts of sleep thrown in, then repeat after the 11 pm feeding.....it's just long enough for me to start on something and not be able to finish, like say breakfast. I have eaten more soggy cereal this week than anyone should ever eat. Babies cry and that just a fact, but when they cry for 3 continous hours, at least 3 days a week, for three weeks in a row, they may have colic. I'm keeping a crying journal on this baby because we are going on day three this week of 2-3 hours of crying that in inconsolable! Sometimes I laugh at little Sadie and sometimes I want to cry, like at 2 am when she is clearly not interested in going back to sleep but fakes me out by closing her eyes for 5 minutes, giving me just enough time to get comfortable and then throwing herself into a tantrum fit for a terrible two year old!
We call this playing possum...."pretending to do something then faking you out"

Baby Daddy: "Do they do that?"
Cunnie: "No! Not really"
April: "HAHAHAHAHAHA"

So while it has been trying I know it's all part of the deal so I did a lot of research today on what to do when your baby won't stop crying, and now I will have to see what actually works! This is not only for myself but also for the Baby Daddy who gets to keep her for a bit tomorrow and on Sunday while I go to baby showers for some friends. I have a list of things to do if Sadie won't stop crying and how to use the frozen breast milk I have stored. I'm not worried. I wrote the instructions down, all he as to do is follow them :)

So today after our crying fit calmed down a bit, I got a shower and adamantly decided I was going to go out with Sadie on our first big girl trip. Big girl for her because no one would be sitting in the back seat with her and big girl for me because no one was going to be in the car with me! It has been a week since I left this house and cabin fever is not the correct term for what I got going on. Cabin Hurricane, Typoid Fever is more like it. It has been really hot here the past few days and today we got a little break from the 102 degrees we experienced yesterday so I thought it would be a good day to take a short ride, get some lunch, and test the water on a solo trip with the baby. Sadie took a little power nap between crying fits and I got a shower, put on my big girl panties, and got myself ready to go. Now get the baby ready and get the diaper bag! This was the first time I had to load everything in the car by myself and I tell you what, it's alot more convenient when your husband carries the baby down the stairs, puts the diaper bag in the car and drives you around, but again, I wanted to go to town so off we went!

I had already decided that I had 10 minutes to change my mind before we got somewhere where it would be hard to turn around. I was not worried, the car usually puts her right to sleep but after the past few days I was not so sure sleep would be a sure bet in the car and since it takes 10 minutes to get from our house to the front gate of the neighboorhood, where all bets are off and it's dog eat dog on the roads, I knew I had those 10 minutes to change my mind, but if we made it that far we would be home free. Popeye's is not far from the gate and I figured I could weather the crying if she started after that point. Well, of course as soon as we got about halfway out of the Harbour, she started crying........eek! My mind is racing, do I turn around or do I forge on? I got my big girl panties on and it would be a shame to waste the wear, I only break them out on special occassions on onward we went on our quest for spicy Louisiana chicken.

Luckily, she only cried for about 15 seconds and I let out a huge sigh of relief. We made it to the red light at the front gate and I thought, this is going pretty good so I contemplated a Bank of America pit stop to deposit my disablity check, but seeing there were two people in line at the ATM, it's Friday afternoon, and the Stafford Plaza was a MADHOUSE, I skipped that hot mess and went onward to Popeye's. There are 3 redlights in between the front gate of my neighboorhood and Popeye's, guess how many times Sadie Marie cried after we got out of the Harbour.......Seven times. She cried when I stopped at each red light and once at the Popeye's stop. Not to shabby if I do say so myself, the cries stopped when we started moving again and they were just annoyed cries not the death defying screams she had been delivering, so all in all a successful trip! We made our way back home and I got us all back inside the house without incident. I put Sadie Marie in her swing and she's still swinging almost 3 hours later.....but Houston we have movement, so I'm going to wrap this up and below are some pictues of her before we left the house today.

Love y'all,


April

Sadie and her two little buddies, they kept her company on the ride today!

Sleep Deprivation Makes You Do Funny Stuff

So last night was a doozy. Sadie Marie was not interested in sleeping very much, she was interested in eating......ALOT! She would fall asleep nursing and I would too, thus she was not eating enough to keep her full for more than an hour and she would wake up hungry so finally around 3:15 am I kept myself awake and nursed her almost an hour I figured this would force a milk induced coma she would be unable to fight so I could sleep for a few hours before we got up for the day, but what I didn't anticipate was the amount of spit up it might also produce in the process. I forgot to stop about halfway through and burp her so after an hour of nursing she was ripe. I put her over my should her and BAM projectile spit up all down my back and onto the bed. Awesome. The husband was awake at this point and said, "You got vomit all down your back, I rubbed it in for you but you should probably shirts." Me, "Thanks?" Why rub it in? I have no idea what help this was but at 4 am I was grateful for anything even if it didn't make sense.

So I got up to change the baby, change my shirt, and got back in the bed to find a nice wet spot where vomit had also reached the bed. It had not been rubbed in and since my assistant had gotten up to go to work at this point, I rubbed it in and laid down. I had planned on changing the bed sheets and showering today anyway.........I figured at this point more vomit is probably in my future so no need to rush to clean up.

Fast forward to 7:00 am, I have just finished feeding and burping Sadie Marie, or so I thought. I laid her on the bed to grab the burp cloth and put her back in her sleeper and when I turn around, BAM vomit on the bed. Awesome. I rubbed it in and went back to bed. I figure this second wet spot was just what I needed to force myself to wash the bedsheets and myself today. I guess if I want anyone's vomit on me it's hers. It's just breast milk right? I have been watching enough Locked Up Abroad to know there are much worse places to sleep than in my own breast milk.

So I'm happy to report mission accomplished. My good friend Chelsea came over for a few hours today and let me get a much needed house cleaning in. A dirty house is just a stressor for me so while I don't like to clean, I need to clean to feel good about myself. I cleaned the house, bedsheet change included, showered, ate lunch, and then fed Sadie Marie. Thank goodness for buddies who work 3 days a week. Chelsea is a nurse and if I feel safe letting anyone care for Sadie Marie at this point it's her! Plus she's pregnant and needs the practice :)

So I'm happy to report that little Sadie is really filling out, at least that is what my family is saying. I had not even noticed her little hands and feet were not longer alien looking. Instead of scrawny and blue they are fat and pink! They actually look like little baby hands and feet. Cunnie pointed this out from a picture I sent her yesterday.....I kinda felt bad I had not even noticed until she said it but then I realized I'm more focused on feeding, dressing, and keeping the kid alive than I am determining if her feet are filling out. What I have noticed is how small my ankles have gotten. No more cankles for this lady and I can't tell you how pumped I am about that. Also, while my pre-pregnancy pants don't quite fit yet without some spare tire action, my pre-pregnancy shoes do!

I was SO worried that my feet might not go back to the same size they were before I was pregnant. I have heard stories about ladies whose feet never go back to the same size they were before baby and I have to tell you I was dreading having to tell the husband that I had to buy shoes because my feet were bigger than before. I can't imagine him buying that line, even if it was true! Luckily, I'm able to get my shoes on and since I have so many fabulous pairs I cannot wait to wear some of them again! I think I will save this special occassion for my Alabama trip. I fully plan on a night out with friends for my birthday in July and any girl will tell you a great pair of shoes can make anyone feel like a rockstar. After all the dooty diapers, spit up, and sleepless nights I think the husband and I will deserve a night out and I LOVE feeling like a rockstar :) I have a pair of Paris Hilton shoes that SCREAM rockstar! Consider them packed.

Thankgoodness my cankles are GONE!

Sadie's little feet filling out!

Over the next few weeks, I'm sure we will continue settling in and getting into a groove. Today was the baby daddy's first day back and work and I was a little nervous about being home all day alone with the baby, but thanks to Chelsea I was not all along AND John Rob is here working from home so......I guess tomorrow will be the true test. In any case all is good and I can barely put her down. So, I'm off to feed little Sadie Marie. I swear this child is going to be ginormous by the time I get to Alabama in a few weeks!

Love y'all,

April


Well I had some other pictures for y'all but I can't get them to upload, maybe tomorrow!

That Just Looks Painful!

I went to the doctor today for a check up.......after delivery because even though Sadie Marie was small, she was sunny side up and according to the doctor today when they are facing up it's like giving birth to a basketball, where as when they are face down they tuck their head and it's like a football, and much easier on your lady parts when giving birth. So Sadie, was face up and I've been sitting on a donut for a week and a half and then on Saturday I noticed some red splotches on my arms. I thought my eczema was flaring up, but then it got worse and moved up my arms some......and then it got much worse. My mom was here and she gave me some hydrocortizone to put on it to help with the itching but it was not making the actual eczema any better......then it got even worse spreading to my legs and I came to the conclusion it might not be eczema and I was already going to the doctor on Friday so I figured I would just tough it out till then. It has not been easy. I have been pretty much bathing in hydrocortizone and some kinda of diaper rash cream that smells like diaper rash cream and makes me smell like diaper rash cream.......So, today I get to the doctor and he comes in to ask how I have been and I showed him the rash...it's never good when the doctor goes, "OH! WOW! That looks painful, we need to get you some steroids for that".....thanks doc I feel much better about my appearance, at least its not on my face I guess.

So I have PUPPPS, Pruritic urticarial papules and plaques of pregnancy. Usually you only get this while pregnant but just as Sadie seemed to be against me during labor, she was also plotting against me before she left the womb. This how the doctor explained it to me today. Even though a baby is a foreign object in your body, you allow it to grow whether it agrees with you or not. The baby realizes that the tissue surrounding it is also foreign and begins rejecting that tissue and it causes the immune system to kinda freak out and it shows on the skin. It's not contagious and it's not very serious, it just itches like hell and makes me watch to scratch my skin off. Of course if anyone is going to get this AFTER they have their baby it's me. So now I get a week of steriods that are probably gonna make me want to knaw my own arms off and eat them I'm going to be so hungry! I'm trying to lose the baby weight here folks. Lock up the cookies! Hell, lock the pantry!

Funny story, last night Sadie slept pretty good, she was up about every two hours and then around 4 am she had a marathon nap until about 830 this morning. I didn't wake baby daddy up the first two rounds, but at 4 am I needed a little help. So he got up and was just kinda soothing Sadie and "squelch"....she pooped, a big time poop. If you have read the last blog, you know you have to wait a hot minute before changing her, she has not peed yet and she will pee on you! After a few minutes of just pacifying her, he went to change her diaper and when he came back I noticed some poop on her blanket. We got a new blanket and then when he returned we had the following conversation:

Baby Daddy: "Crap, I got poop on my shirt"
Me: "Crap, I bet it's on her too"

I'm looking and looking and looking and I cannot find any poop on Sadie Marie. She had an a sleep sack, it's really long and really too big since she's so small and I was convinced she had poop on her clothes if it had gotten on he blanket and on the baby daddy. Now we have this conversation:

Me: "Well there's no poop on her, how the crap did you manage that?"
Baby Daddy: "I have no idea"
Me: "SHIT!" "There's crap on the floor!"
Baby Daddy: "WHAT?!" "WTF?!"

You read correctly folks, last night at 4 AM, the Baby Daddy somehow manage to get poop on the blanket, his shirt, the floor in our bedroom but NOT on the baby or on her clothes. It takes a talented individual to get poop on everything but the thing that produced the poop. I feel like Sadie has been reading the Babies Guide to Making Your Parents Think They are Crazy and speed read right to the "Using Your Poop" chapter.  She has been using poop against us ever since she learned to poop and I'm thinking of revoking her library card.

It's getting late and she's ready to eat again so we will see what goes on tonight, if we have one more poop incident I'm getting a video camera and we are going to win America's Funniest Home Videos. If y'all could have seen us looking for poop last night at 4 AM, it might have been a super bowl commmercial worthy laugh!

Pray for less poop and more sleep. Amen.

Happy 1st Birthday Elsie! Auntie April loves you!

Love y'all,

April

Elvis Has Left the Building.....

It's official we are on our own.......well for two weeks anyway. Cunnie left today and is headed back to Selma this morning. We dropped her off at the Quantico train station where she will Amtrack it to BWI, stop in ATL, and then finish in BHM.......did y'all follow all those acronyms? I know Jules did, she is beyond experienced in traveling from AL to VA!
Sadie Marie had three big outing this week and at only 1 week old I say we did pretty good for first time parents.....granted we had the help of Cunnie but if I was getting a grade for this I would say it was a solid A. I didn't cry, Theron and I didn't threaten to divorce each other, there was only one poop incident, and no one left the baby on the top of the car (I have seen this happen before!) We also learned some stuff:

1. Always take 1-2 bottles with you. I thought bringing my boobs was enough but apparently it's not always convenient for me or the baby to breast feed and besides that it's pretty illegal to take her out of the car seat to eat while driving down the road.

2. If Sadie has pooped, but she's not wet - WAIT FOR IT! She will pee on you as soon as you change her diaper.

3. If the boobs are leaving the house to go anywhere for more than 30 minutes, fix bottles first. Theron and I went to the grocery store last night. I was gone for 1.25 hours, we got home and Cunnie was all disheveled. She was sweating and we had this conversation before I could even get up the stairs:

Cunnie: "April, come inside and feed the baby"
April: "I'm coming"
Cunnie: "Come inside now, I will help Theron with the groceries"
April: "I'm coming"
Cunnie: "She's been screaming, I fed her some of the milk you pumped, she threw it up, and she now needs a bath. You can't leave the house for more than 30 minutes till she is at least 6 weeks old."
April: "OK" My thought: Great, Theron is going to have to do the grocery shopping or we are going to have buy Sadie Marie a bubble so she can go the store with me next week. Does anyone know where I can get a bubble, it's easier than sending Theron to the grocery store........

4. Always use the plastic travel changer so you don't get mustard poop on your white shirt.
5. Sadie Marie does NOT sleep flat on her back. She needs to recline because she's cool like that.
6. Having a baby is a dirty job.....Mike Rowe needs to visit a day care for an episode of Dirty Jobs.

It's only been week and we have already learned that if she's not sleeping neither are we.....we all took turns staying up with her and finally yesterday mom found a kinda reclining sleeper......low and behold she slept all night last night....what I consider all night anyway. I got four uninterrupted hours of sleep and woke up feeling like a new person this morning! I was talking to Theron about said sleep and he is not in agreement that it was all night but compared to the previous 1.5 - 2 hours we were getting.....I will take it! Hopefully it will only get better and this is not a fluke, Miss Sadie loves to play possum, pretending to sleep for a minute or two, screaming for a minute or two, and so on and so on.....She's real convincing too....just when I think I've done it and put her to sleep I see the red come back into her face and I know a scream follow so we shall see if this sleeper works and I will give y'all an update on that later.

Today should be interesting, it will be my first day alone with the baby. Theron is getting ready to leave for a half day at work. I have already showered and tried to get everything done I needed to before he leaves so I can relax and play with Sadie. I got a book in the mail, "Playing with Your Baby: 12 Months of Fun." In 0-3 months we grow and tell......at birth, your baby can smell your breast milk, which is why she stops crying when mom hands her to me, she does not love me anymore than she loves you, she's just hungry and knows I got the goods, but she can see my face. She can focus on objects 8-12 inches away and wouldn't you know it! That is exactly how far her face is from mine when I hold her or so the book says, wonder if they know I'm a midget? In any case, that is pretty cool stuff right?

I'm still on a learning curve so hopefully over the next two weeks I don't fail too badly, she has survived the first 4 hours being alone with us so I think we can do it. Too late to turn back now. I do seriously need everyone to put their heads together and figure a way for my mom to quit her job and move here so she can keep Sadie when I go back to work. My cousin Angie went back to work yesterday and sent Elsie to day care for a full day.......

1. They fed Elsie pizza.....she does not have teeth.....WTF. Are you retarded? how can Elsie chew pizza without teeth?
2. It was a scorcher yesterday and when Angie got there to pick Elsie up she was wet with sweat because they had been outside. It was advised for adults to stay INSIDE yesterday so on what planet was it a good idea to take the 1 year olds outside?

All I can say is Yikes......I'm sure they had good intentions but when it comes to your child, you do things a certain way and when she comes with a packed lunch why the crap do you feed her pizza? Here's your sign!

Here's what we did after we dropped Cunnie off and got home. Theron just left for work after his nap so now Sadie and I will take one. He always looks so peaceful, I wonder if I look that way? Probably not, I'm dreaming about the freaking Criminal Minds episode I watched last night where someone's little girl got snatched from right up under her.........I told Theron yesterday when we were in Babies R Us we were going to purchase a harness as soon as she can walk so I can have her attached to me at all times until she is at least 16. I think she'll be OK with that....what do y'all think? :)

Love y'all!

April

what's wrong with this picture? I'm not in it! I was the only one not asleep this morning, what can I say I not a napper....

Big Time Buddies! He's already talking about taking her fishing!